Stop Data Dumping Onto Your Listeners and Start MOVING Them Instead

Before figuring out what to say, figure out what you want!

What you end up saying in a meeting, presentation or sales pitch will be much less impactful if you don't have a plan.

The best plan starts with determining what you want to happen as a result of the interaction. This serves as your GPS.

It's about action, not information.

Moving your listeners, not filling them up.

Here's the most powerful question you can use before planning your first words:

💡 What do I want my listeners to do as a result of this communication?

Once you've answered this, now you're ready to play the guide for them along the journey.

Only because you've first entered the coordinates of the destination you are taking them to.

#communication #planning #leadershipdevelopment

REPLAY: 5 Habits Hurting Your Executive Presence Webinar

Even the most engaging communicators have habits that keep them from looking and sounding comfortable and confident while speaking. However, most of us know we are giving away our power and gravitas in meetings and presentations, but aren't sure how to get it back. In this 60-minute webinar, we will cover some key ways you might be hurting your executive presence, and what you can do about it.

Shift: Why "If You Can't Find 'Em, Grind 'Em" is a Terrible Way to Lead

When I was turning 16, it was a rite of passage to learn how to drive a stick shift (manual transmission) before getting my license. Some of you are reading this and thinking about how you couldn’t drive a car without knowing how to operate a manual transmission – it was the only option! Today, you and I would be hard pressed to find a vehicle with a manual transmission (unless you’re driving a high-end sports car). That’s right, less than 3% of vehicles on the road have manual transmissions.

Have you ever stopped to think about the modern miracle of how a transmission works? Well, if not, then here’s a rudimentary lesson, courtesy of “How Stuff Works”:

“Cars need transmissions because of the physics of the gasoline engine. First, any engine has a redline — a maximum rpm value above which the engine cannot go without exploding. You shift gears so the engine can stay below the redline and near the rpm band of its best performance.” 

The clutch is the mechanism that disengages the powered engine from the moving wheels. If you want to shift gears, you’ll need the clutch, which provides a momentary break in action, so to speak.

Much like a vehicle, if we continue press the gas pedal, our bodies will keep going. But push it too much for too long, we will overheat.

Our bodies, minds and spirits require the “pushing in of the clutch” to disengage. It’s an intentional action to shift. A break in the movement of different pieces and parts of our jobs and lives.

When the momentum is great, the stopping power needs to be ever greater. I’d think of this as our ability to stop, press pause and reflect and make meaning of what is happening in our lives.

This is what working with a leadership/executive coach can offer you - An invitation for you to push in the clutch and make intentional decisions for your life. It’s not meant to be tips and tricks, although you might find some along the way. Rather, it’s meant to be a chance to find your resolve, tune into what matters most to you, and then take control over the decisions you are making on a day to day basis. 

Ask yourself: 

·      What am I shifting toward? 

·      What must I shift away from? 

·      Am I shifting into a higher gear or a lower gear? 

·      In order to shift, what must happen first? 

·      Am I willing to shift?

Because in life, “if you can’t find ‘em, grind ‘em” is not the best way to operate.

EPISODE 4: 4-Part Series on the Enneagram in Life and Leadership

EPISODE 3: 4-Part Series on the Enneagram in Life and Leadership

EPISODE 2: 4-Part Series on the Enneagram in Life and Leadership

EPISODE 1: 4-Part Series on the Enneagram in Life and Leadership

PAUSE: A Moment to Reflect on 2020 and to Look Forward in 2021.

Season’s Greetings!

 Wow, what could we even possibly say about the year each of us has just experienced? I have a few in mind, but I’ll keep it PC. I also know that we’ve still got quite a road ahead of us…

A part of what I’ve experienced this year is that I’ve learned much about myself, my priorities and even my aspirations for the year (and beyond!) ahead as I’ve balanced work, family priorities, and the ever-changing landscape that 2020 has offered to me/us. 

 As I try to do every year, I’m fortunate to be taking some time away from work to spend with my immediate family (no travel this year), reflect and be grateful for the lessons learned during 2020, and to begin dreaming about 2021. I hope you’ll be able to do the same. 

 It has been an honor to work with and be with you through our coaching sessions and development initiatives. I’m honored that you would reserve your time and energy throughout 2020 to grow and develop yourself, and I greatly appreciate your trust in me as your coach. Trust me when I say that our sessions and interactions have provided me with many benefits, because I’ve learned from you as well! 

I give you one last challenge to consider as we approach the end of the year:

·       Make a 30-60 minute “date” with yourself. 
·       Find a quiet place, a choice beverage, and bring your journal. 
·       Below are some questions to reflect on and write about – choose one, a few, or all of them to generate some thoughts, gratitude and acknowledgement about how you’ve grown over the past year, while also dreaming and setting an intention for the year ahead. Thanks to my colleague Shelley for the inspiration behind most of these questions!

QUESTIONS FOR REFLECTING ON A YEAR OF LEARNING AND GROWTH

This Year:

• What did I accomplish?

• What impact did I have on individuals, teams, and my organization?

• What adversity did I face this year?

  • What parts of the adversity were out of my control?

  • How did I make it through the adversity? How did I thrive?

  • What resources did I leverage? Be specific.

  • What resources do I wish I had leveraged? Be specific.

• What did I learn? What did I learn through coaching?

• What did I learn about myself?

• What evidence—or “deliverables”—do I have for any of these learnings or impacts?

Next Year:

• What are my hopes and intentions for this new year?

• How can this new year help me lay the foundations for things to come?

• How do I want to be in this year? Who do I want to become?

• How can I make time for restoration and creativity?

• Which relationships do I really want to establish? Grow? Maintain?

• What do I really want to remember when I reflect back in a year from now?

• What will make this next year hard?

• What is my strategy for addressing these “hard things?”

2021 won’t drive itself – let’s all be intentional about creating and renewing ourselves so that, when we get to this time next year, we can see how we’ve each taken the initiative to become an even better version of ourselves. Speaking of which, I’ll be kicking off a workshop in late January/early February called “Hero On a Mission”. If you’re looking to be intentional not only with 2021, but your life, this workshop is for you. Feel free to forward along to any colleagues who may benefit. You can find more information and sign up here: https://www.anchoredleadership.com/hero.

Grateful for you – all that you do, but more importantly for who you are.

Jason

10 Ways to Effectively Lead Virtual Teams

Are you challenged to keep your team engaged while working virtually? We've shared these tips so much recently that we thought you'd benefit from a summary…

How do you apply your leadership capabilities to what may be an entirely new context – leading a team that is working entirely or partially from home? Our first reminder is that much of what worked for you when everyone was in the office still applies! Don’t sell yourself short on your ability to keep the vision and accountabilities moving forward. However, challenges that may have already existed with individual associates and team dynamics won’t go away – as a matter of fact, they may become more apparent or intensify. It’s important to notice them and decide how to handle them. 

Here are some ideas to help you keep your team engaged and tackling the most important work priorities as we shift from exclusively working as an intact team at a designated office space.  

THE APPROACH

While you may be most interested in practical tips, we believe that your approach is most important. 

1.     Set ground rules and expectations with the team – Especially in times of crisis, you may decide to communicate as much information as possible, as frequently as possible. It’s important to be intentional about the frequency, duration and purpose of virtual meetings. As situations change, consider revisiting the construct of how meetings are held and conducted.

PRO TIP: Cameras on or off? “Zoom fatigue” is a real thing. While experts generally recommend to always turn the camera on when you have a choice, it’s worth noting that this can be overdone. It’s up to you to determine what works best for your team. Consider the value of having everyone turn on their cameras and strike a balance with this. Our suggestion is that, for groups larger than four participants, cameras should be on, unless specific situations or extenuating circumstances prevent someone from doing so. 

2.     Revisit expectations – given that many organizations aren’t returning to offices in the near future, it is important to revisit expectations that were initially created when teams were sent home from the office at the start of the pandemic. Even if we return by Labor Day, we are only now at the “halfway point.” 

PRO TIP: Consider the value of having a “halftime check-in” with your team by re-visiting the way you do work. Dedicate an entire meeting or the beginning of each meeting to discussion centered on these questions. You’ll learn some key insights from your team while inviting them to actively engage in decisions that will have a direct impact on their lives.

o What is working so far?
o What is not working so far, or may have outlived its usefulness?
o What is something creative that we can try to optimize the way we work as a team?

  3.     Determine how to distinguish “Work Accomplished” from “Hours Worked” – take time to clarify the priorities of your team, as well as who is responsible for certain work streams. Encourage your associates to leverage existing tools, including capacity trackers, milestone charts, and project charters. 

4.     Check in more than you check up. As the leader, of course you need to make sure that work streams are continuing and that business is moving forward. But, losing sight of HOW that work is getting done (your talented associates!) will cost you in the end through disengagement. Taking the time to see how they are doing, what support they need, what will help them stay engaged is a critical part of leading. If they only experience you texting, calling or emailing with status updates about the latest project, they may become frustrated or feel unappreciated.

 PRO TIP: Learn about their situation: Honor that no two work from home spaces or situations are the same. Some are at their kitchen table, or in their bedroom, not in a lavish home office. Some aren’t as tech savvy as others. That doesn’t necessarily mean they don’t have the same value to the team, or motivation to be productive. Give them grace and support!  Also, keep in mind that working partners, the presence of kids, pets and live-in parents also add a layer to the challenge for all of us.

PRO TIP: Ask them how they’d like for you to follow up with them. Think of this time as though you’ve just hired a brand new team and are in the first 90 days in-role. Having a beginner’s mindset can help you find new ways of working and leading. Giving them ownership over their interactions with you will pay off. Ask questions and listen intently.

5.     Lighten up: Consider ways to bring necessary social connections to virtual meetings. Some leaders use a “question of the day” to begin meetings (favorite restaurant, something fun your family did this week, showing pictures of special people/places). Others have implemented a specific day where a regularly-scheduled meeting is a phone call only so members of the team can move around. Hint: It’s great to move throughout the day!

PRO TIP: Get people moving. Make a meeting intentionally different. Our team does a “Walking Wednesday” for one of our 30-minute meetings - just one of the ways we try to mix it up a bit.


PRO TIP: Shorten 60-minute meetings to 50 minutes (or less). If you have an hour scheduled, chances are you’ll use it. The same applies to shorter meetings. See if you can afford the opportunity to cover more information in less time. 

THE PRACTICAL

If you’re here for the “Practical” tips, here they are. This certainly isn’t an exhaustive list, but will at least get you started. 

1.     Hone your technology game – Take additional time to learn how to better navigate WebEx, Jabber, MS Teams and other popular, secure platforms. Can you start that next meeting without asking, “Can you see me?” or “Can you hear me?” because you’re that confident in your ability to use the techology. Your setup and background also matter, especially lighting. If you are able, position yourself in front of a window or light so everyone can see your face. Close curtains or blinds behind you to prevent you from showing up with heavy shadowing.

PRO TIP: Utilize the chat function and live polling to engage large teams. Don’t assume that everyone can speak up from the setting they are in (maybe they’re holding a sleeping baby or have kids being loud in the background) or are as extroverted as others. The chat provides a great opportunity for everyone to share ideas.

PRO TIP: Prompt the team to answer an open-ended question using the chat function or to request particular agenda items to be discussed.

2.     Up your communication game – while there are some differences to looking at a screen versus in-person meetings, many of the same skills are critical to ensure you’re communicating effectively.

o   Use pauses to give your team a chance to consider your questions and then to come off of mute and respond. Remember, it will often feel longer to you than it does to your listeners. Use silence strategically! 

o   Place your camera at eye level. If need be, stack books to get your laptop higher. It’s a better viewing experience when you’re listeners aren’t looking at you from an angle.

o   Remember that the camera represents their eyes. When you are speaking, look into the camera, not at the faces on the screen (or yourself). This will help increase the feeling that you are trying to see them. If you’re tempted to look at yourself, you can change the settings to “speaker view” or “gallery view”. Experiment with the optimal setting for you.

o   Always assume that your camera is on – if the meeting is running, consider anything you say or do (including your eye rolls!) to be viewable, even if the camera is turned off. You’ll thank us later for this tip! You can cover your camera with a post-it note or a camera cover if you want an extra layer of security.  

o   Never assume that your chat is private – most chat functions default to “message everyone” on the call, and you must change it if you want to send a private message to another meeting participant. 

PRO TIP: The moderator receives a full transcript of ALL chat conversations, including the private ones between individuals. You might even share this reality with your teams so they aren’t sending messages they will later regret.

 Start experimenting in your next virtual meeting with these tips and let us know what is working well for you. Also let us know what challenges you encounter and how we can support you as you lead your team in the weeks and months ahead.

If you’ve read this far and want a downloadable pdf of this summary, visit HERE to grab it.

Let Your Voice Be Heard

Seemingly out of nowhere this week, a moment flashed from my fairly recent past. It was 2012 in New York City. I was working as a communication coach, leading a multi-day workshop for business leaders from different companies. Our promise to them was that they would find their inner self and truly embody what it means to be a powerful communicator and presenter.

We had been together for three entire days and moving into the final opportunity for coaching – each client had been coached given feedback at least six or seven times. I can’t remember the company that he worked for – was it financial services? Non-profit? It doesn’t really matter. But, I do know that our group included clients of different genders, ethnicities, and geographic locations and industries.

I don’t remember his name, but I can still see his face, what he was wearing and recall that he had a strong physical presence. For this particular client, I had been coaching him hard all week to bring more power, more confidence, and more authority to his speaking style (this was his chosen goal). The way he communicated didn’t match his physical appearance. The softness in his voice and lack of eye contact betrayed his strong, grounded stance. I knew he had the ability within himself to bring strength to his message, but I had only seen small glimpses the entire week and was left scratching my head why he wasn’t “going there” all the way.

When I’m coaching someone, I share that my coaching is meant to help them expand their range – it might be helping someone who is overly direct bring more warmth, someone who speaks really fast to slow down to better connect, a leader who struggles with delegating to give someone else a chance to complete the project. It’s always about expansion in my mind, adding more of who we are and taking away parts of us that don’t serve us any longer. It’s never about completely changing who we are, per se.

I knew I had one more shot to push him to try on some new ways of speaking before he went back to his workplace, back to his team, back to the environment that allowed him to blend in, blocking his power and strength to influence others. It was the last chance to help him “try on” a new way of being in the world to see how he looked and sounded. 

I coached him to “say it like you really want us to get it, like you’re saying this for the last time.” And he did. He brought one more notch of energy to his voice, formed his words so you could read his lips, which brought greater life to his facial expressions. His idea landed like a dart hitting the bullseye. From my spot in the back of the room, I could see his fellow participants smiling at the impact he was creating by overcoming the hesitance to let his voice be heard. It was an incredibly powerful and impactful moment. He nailed it. And we had captured all of it on video for him to take away with him after the workshop. This was proof of the “progress” he had worked so hard to create for the past three days.

Except, from the front of the room, he didn’t seem as though he had “nailed it.” It was more like the look on his face and his body language was communicating, “There, I did it. I hope you’re happy now.” By the way, it isn’t uncommon to see someone create a breakthrough moment, followed by surprise when their fellow participants share that their power, the projection in their voice, the expression on their face, etc. isn’t “too much.” This often helps them realize their progress and creates buy-in for taking on new behaviors, like pausing longer, making eye contact or projecting their voice more.

Then, I finally learned what was holding him back the entire workshop. In response to feedback, he said it – to an entire group of strangers – or rather, new friends, I’d prefer to say:

“I am afraid of coming across like an angry black man.” 

His statement was barely finished before the group and I proceeded to reassure him that he simply came across as more confident, more impactful and engaging. I mean, he really did. It was powerful.

But we all missed an incredible opportunity to see – actually see – and acknowledge him in that moment of raw vulnerability. To listen and seek to better understand. To ask him how he wanted to best “show up” when sharing his ideas through spoken word, given what he was also experiencing internally. We missed the opportunity to validate what he so courageously shared.

Looking back, I now realize I didn’t validate him because I didn’t believe his perspective to be true or accurate. At least not through my lens of being straight, white, male (read, my privilege and my ignorance). It’s not that I blatantly felt that way. I just didn’t see it. Regardless, here’s what I was indirectly communicating – “Come on, you’re overthinking it. You’re worrying for no reason. Just throw your worries aside and be stronger when you speak.” Because I have permission, even encouragement, to walk into a room and be loud, strong, direct with no repercussions. This I now see and acknowledge…and take advantage of.

While I’d like to think my coaching skills have improved much in the past eight years, I know I must be ever-present to the unique challenges that keep all of us from fully expressing ourselves, from letting others fully see us, especially in the workplace. I do this through listening intently and asking questions. We’d all be served better by doing this.

So if you are this former client of mine, please forgive me. I’m sorry. I was coaching through the invisible lens of my white privilege. Over the past two years of my coaching journey, I’ve never been more aware of the fact that my life experiences aren’t anyone else’s, which has served me well to stay in a “coaching stance” (inquiry, asking questions, helping my clients discover) instead of a “consultant stance” (providing answers, telling you what to try). Over the past month, I’ve never been more sensitive to the fact that being unaware or choosing to ignore my privilege can be downright damaging to others. 

Wherever you are my friend, I hope your voice is strong, clear, and impactful and that your message is cutting through any noise that tries to drown it out. You are strong and powerful and we need your voice now more than ever.